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Here’s the transcript from a recent conversation I had with my friend, Kimi:

Me: Do you have any time to hang out in the near future?

Kimi: Once school ends I’ll have lots of time.

Me: Yay! We should make plans. Maybe a movie?

Kimi: African Cats!

Me: I wouldn’t mind seeing that on a Saturday afternoon…so fewer people will see me.

Kimi: You just made me literally lqtm.

Me: (staring at the phone, thoroughly perplexed) Lqtm? Lqtm. What the heck does that mean? When did that abbreviation become a thing? Why have I not heard of it? Ok, one letter at a time. What does “L” stand for? Laughing! It has to be laughing. Nothing else would make sense. Llama? No, laughing. Laughing…laughing quinoa toaster mmmm? No. Ok, she said it was something she was literally doing. Laughing…quickly? Laughing quixotically? Laughing…I don’t know anymore “q” words. Curse you, Kimi! Quietly! Hahaha! Laughing quietly…(looks at Bella the dog) Do you know what this means? (Bella gives me her “heck no” look) This is harder than the stupid GRE! Laughing quietly…wait a minute (stares intently at text message) Oh…laughing quietly to myself.

Kimi: (realizing that I’m probably staring at the phone trying to figure out “lqtm”) Lqtm. What does it stand for?

Me: (Triumphant) Laughing quietly to myself!

Kimi: NICE! You ARE going to grad school.

Me: (steam rising out of my ears) Only took me five minutes to figure out…

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