As most of you know, I have a strange and somewhat creepy fascination with Asians.
If given the opportunity, I would marry an Asian man.
My friend, Tesia, is aware of this and so the following conversation took place.
Tesia: You know I found this article on the web that says that more and more Asian men are marrying Black women.
Me: Really? Then I stand a chance!
Tesia: (laughing) I know, right! Could you imagine what your children would look like if you married an Asian man?
Me: Yes. I would mess them up so badly, Tesia. I would find the most stereotypical black name and give it to them. This is my daughter, Tanisha Takahara. My child, Bonaquanita Chang.
Tesia: This is my baby Shaneequa Lee.
Me: (laughing) I would make them wear kimonos and then cornrow their hair! My children would hate me so bad!
Tesia: Your children would come to me and say, ‘Auntie, why does Mommy make us wear this stuff and then laugh hysterically?’
Me: (laughing) Or ‘Auntie, why does Mommy make us eat jerk chicken egg rolls? Does Mommy hate us?’
Tesia: No, children. Your mother’s just a wee bit racist.
We may or may not have riffed on this topic for another fifteen minutes.
May or may not.