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In case this lovely blog series has motivated you to run the Disney Princess Half-Marathon (yeah right), I should tell you one important bit of information: there are hills at the end of the race.

This is Florida, so the hills aren’t that big or steep, but when you’ve been running for nearly 2 hours an ant hill becomes Kilamanjaro.

Thankfully, my friend, Devon, told me about the hills beforehand, but I didn’t keep them in the forefront of my mind like I should have. When I reached the first hill I said something, “ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! SINCE WHEN ARE THERE HILLS IN FLORIDA?! WHY DID NO ONE TELL ME ABOUT THE- oh yeah Devon did mention that…”

So after running for nearly two hours, I lengthened my stride, put on my big girl pants, and started chugging up the hill.

“I think I can, I think I can, I think I can…CURSE YOU PIXIE! I think I can, I think I can, I think I can…”

The first hill wasn’t that bad. Kira and I made it up and over in a few minutes. We were motivated. We were on fire! We had this! We were gonna nail this race!

Then she stepped on a bad piece of road and rolled her ankle.

It’s amazing how quickly you can lose steam in a race.

 We approached the second hill and I no longer felt like Xena, Warrior Princess. Yes, when I run, I pretend I’m Xena, Warrior Princess. It’s either Xena or Carrie from the Matrix. Some people have playlists to motivate them, I play pretend. On occasion I have also been Storm from the X-Men, but that’s only when I’m running in the rain.

Please don’t judge me.

At the second hill my mantra quickly changed.

“I think I can? I think I can? I think I can? I don’t think I can, I don’t think I can, I don’t think I can.”

And then the third hill stood looming over us…

“I know I can’t, I know I can’t, I know I can’t, I know I can’t.”

Whoever planned out that course should be beaten to death by the pixies.

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